I’ve dealt with this label for as long as I can remember life in detail. I’ve always had this exhausting drive for more. At the core of who I am, it is a drive for excellence in all that I put my hands to and that’s not bad. That’s the kind of thing that makes me endure. It makes me refuse to quit! However, when I get caught up in myself, that drive for excellence takes a horrid turn towards unattainable perfection and runs that car head into destruction where I barely survive. It’s like a thirst that just can’t be quenched. You can achieve one goal and miss out on the joy of celebration because you are already hustling towards the next level. More often times than not, because I have such high expectations for myself, I don’t hit the target and unleash the ultimate mean girl on myself when I fail. I break that strong girl down. I tell her she should’ve done better. She could’ve done more. Ummmm… that’s not healthy, people. I do this with working out, my nutrition, my business, my mothering, all the things. It is hard-wired into who I am, but I have to keep that trait in check so it doesn’t turn Go-Getter into Crazy Girl.
Y’all… that’s why a healthy spirit is VITAL to the peace of our lives. Being able to RECOGNIZE, STOP, and PRAY. Kind of like stop, drop and roll. Ha. You are ON FIRE. If you keep running around like a mad woman, the fire spreads baby! So, when I RECOGNIZE crazy (sometimes that takes longer than other times), I STOP and I PRAY for God to help me get ahold of that girl and calm down. I have to RESET and REMEMBER. That RESET button is my favorite because we can use it at any time on any day! We all deal with our own versions of “bad” moments when we just need to back up. I do it all of the time. Sometimes I have to RESET a few times a day! Haha! Then, I have to REMEMBER. Remember how far I’ve come and be thankful. I am a different person than I was 4 years ago. I’m a different woman than I was last month. My spirit (just like my mind and body) grows, matures and flourishes as I care for it. I get stronger, healthier, wiser, more capable of meaningful relationships, more vulnerable and therefore more able to connect with the people around me with each step I take towards being the best version of myself. Crazy girl is NOT the best version of me!
I hope you’ll take this lesson today if you find yourself being hard on yourself for whatever reason. RECOGNIZE, STOP & PRAY.